dear GOD,
i should be very thankful to you.
why?
because you gave me amazing friends,
the best families.
the good life.
everything.
your blessing that i can't count one by one :)
thank you so much, Jesus.
love you, Father.

dad's

dear dad, happy birthday.
the best wishes for you.
makin sehat, panjang umur, banyak rejeki, makin deket sama tuhan.
you know i love you so much dad.

17-10-10

well. this is my birthday, everybody.
i'm eighteen now.
old, eh?
its 01.40 p.m . and in this post i wanna review my 17 life.

i got perfectly birthday bash last year.
a boy who loves me so much came to my home and bring me a bucket of 17 roses, and a big pink bear.
and i got all of my friends celebrate my birthday bash.
i passed UN and went to University.
and i thought that my university's life will be boring or something.
and i was wrong.
i had so much fun life in here. beloved friends. a lot of friends.
and they cure me of my miss my hometown feeling.
and i got so many friends too in my kost.
they just gave me cake on 00:00 :P
i'm glad.
happy. just like i have family here.
thank you for bring me joy.

and now, maybe i have to let you go.
really let you go.
i have to.

xoxo,

shindy

p.s : happy birthday to me :)

it feels broken.

hello there.
i feels like an idiot right now.
crying for someone who doesn't care about me at all.
yeah, this called fall.
fall like fall. and no one ready to catch you.
it hurts.
really hurts.

i tried to talk with him.
try to make a lil conversation with him.
i asked him how's his report.
and lucky me, he replied.
i told him i will come to my ex school.
i miss that place. and the main reason why i wanna go there is him.
and he said, is fillas birthday on that day?
i said yeah, that's his day. you, do you remember my day?
and he said, its about october 23 or 24, isn't it?
and i just replied, my birthday is on 17.

you know what?
i hope he will come to my rent house and bring me a flower.
like last year.
come with all of my friends.
to celebrate my birthday.
to show me how much i mean to him.
but the fact is he doesn't remember at all.
he doesn't care.
even a little.
ha-ha. feel sorry for me? thank you.
how about that?
will you feel the same with me if that's on you?

dear you.

dear you.
i just want you to know something.
something about my feeling.
that i, i'm still in love with you. until this second.
i miss you like crazy everyday.
there's something inside of me that wanted you so freakin' bad.
i stuck on you.
i wanna stay with you as long as i can.
i. wanted. you. so. bad.
but i don't have a chance to tell you this.
or if i tell you, i will loose you.
it's not fair for me, really.
but i just don't brave enough to take that chance.
i choose to have you as my friend.
or maybe someday, someone's gonna take your place.
i don't know what else i wanna say to you.
too much things that better left unspoken.
maybe this is the time matter.
and i really happy to hear anything about you.
how's your life.
is it going on its track?
is your life happy, with or without me.
everything.
i'm glad to see you're okay.
you live your life well.
its enough.
i never really stop loving you.
i just learn to try to live without you.

xoxo,

Shindy.